New Adventures in Dentistry

I'm 28 years old and I have a new tooth. Ever since I was about 16, every six months to a year my wisdom teeth will start to cut. The gums in the back of my mouth will be sore for a few weeks, and then... nothing. It just stops. Nothing changes. I chalk this up to the fact that I actually have a very small mouth, and a very small jaw, and really, just not enough room for any more teeth. I barely had room for the adult set as it was. I remember going to the dentist so he could shave bits off the bottom row so they could all squeeze in. So, sorry, wisdom teeth, there just ain't no room at the inn.

Or so I thought.

About a month ago, they started to cut again. And my gums were sore. And then... nothing. Nothing changed. It just stopped. AND THEN, about two weeks after all the soreness had receeded, I noticed a little hole in the back of my mouth. It didn't hurt. It just was. Then, the little hole got bigger, still without hurting. And eventually, I was able to distinguish a sliver of tooth poking out of it. Over the past few days, this sliver of tooth has gotten slightly bigger. It's still only a sliver of tooth, but it is very clearly tooth, and it is very clearly a new part of my mouth. It makes me wonder how far it's going to come in, and whether it's going to cause problems with my other teeth, and whether or not I'll eventually have to have dental surgery, and why God would have designed us to have wisdom teeth if you were going to need to get surgery on them, and why we would have evolved wisdom teeth if that was how it came about, and whether I should give the new guy a name; he might feel intimidated by the others since they're so much bigger and have been around so much longer. Poor little tyke.

To paraphrase the great prophet Bob, 'Either we came from monkeys, or we're supposed to be this way. Either way, I don't like it.'

Meanwhile, it's midterms. I'm all writin' essays and pretending to be a grad student, but I couldn't possibly be a real adult because I have a new tooth. And I'm 28-friggin-years-old.

Michael says maybe one day I'll have as many teeth as he does. He managed to grow his full set with no problems at a young age. Lucky bastard. Hm. Maybe I should have his wisdom teeth talk to my wisdom tooth. A good role model might be just what's needed.