"My wife and I work in the same building at the same university. When I need to work late, I do so without reservations about my personal safey. For men, our campus is safe even late at night. I don't think about whether anyone else is on my floor or who has access to the building. When I walk to my car, I don't need to be alert. However, if she works late, my wife thinks about all of these things. In this society we tolerate a great deal of men's violence toward women, of which sexual assault is but one example. I tis clear that I (and other men) have a privilege that my wife (and other women) do not share.
"Consider a second form of privilege. When my wife and I wish to hold each other's hand or embrace in public, we do so without concern for our safety. As a teenager and college student, I was free to talk with my friends about whom I was dating or wished to date. No one told crude jokes about persons of my sexual orientation. I did not have to agonize about what my sexual orientation was or about whether to tell my parents about it.
"This privilege is not available to one of my closest friends, who is a lesbian. she has been harassed. If she is open about her sexuality, she may be excluded from some of the major institutions of societ: many religious congregations, marriage, adopting a child, careers involving working with children. If she hides her sexuality, she must deal with the personal cost to her integrity and well-being. Finally, the danger of murderous violence is always there for her, at some level of awareness.
"Consider a third form of privilege. Many of my Black friends and colleagues have noted that almost every day, in ways large or small, they are unpleasatly reminded of their race. Though these reminders may be indirect or unintentional, their effects are nonetheless real. Moreover, I have learned that the direct, intimidating incidents of racism are more common than I had realized, even today. In contrast, European Americans may go for years without being confronted with the meaning of our racial status. European Americans are freer (if we wish) to pursue our education, career aspirations, and leisure time almost solely in the company of people of our race. When a conflict occurs and one needs to assert oneself with a superior at work, the manager of a retail business, or the teacher of one's children at school, or when one must call the police, we can be much more confident that we will be dealing with a person of our race. European Americans also can much more easily arrange to protect our children from adults who may harm them on the basis of their race (McIntosh, 1998)."
...
"Whenever you feel like criticizing anyone, he told me, just remember that all the people in this world haven't had the advantages that you've had."
(Fitzgerald, 1925/1995, The Great Gatsby, p.5)
...
This is Kati again. Seriously, I know it's a textbook, but damn am I enjoying reading this. I wish it were more socially acceptable/affordable for people to just sit down and read textbooks. I would recommend this one. There's a lot more I want to add, but I'm already worrying on copyright infringement, so I'll cut it here.
Other recommendations are:
A documentary entitled The Color of Fear, produced by Lee Mun Wah. Eight men of different colors/races/ethnicities and views on racism share a weekend together and talk about color, racism, and power. It is brilliantly insightful. These are just normal men figuring things out.
A book called Uprooting Racism, by Paul Kivel. It's the "White Person's Guide To Understanding Racism." It really puts things in perspective so that white people in a white society can understand the benefits we get that we're used to thinking of as rights. Draws parallels, as above, to gender/orientation/economic inequalities as well.
1 comment:
Yeah, I often feel a little resentful of straight people. I know it's sort of not their fault, but really it mostly is. I once dated someone who actually held that only people should be able to do PDAs (and possibly interracial couples, of any orientation)because straight people had their world long enough, and should now feel oppression. I hate holding hands, but I really shouldn't have to worry about getting jumped when my boyfriend wants to do it, should I?
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