Down the Rabbit Hole

I had a dream last night that my sister Mary and I were in a frenzy of preparations before we started... something that was up-coming. I was supposed to be in a series of meetings regarding... something, but I knew I had a much more important meetings in the surreal and unreal world. I also knew I could not explain this to other people because other people would either object to me wasting my time, or simply wouldn't believe the place I was going to was real. Mary and I were packing for the day (she had other things to do than me) and we threw tins of pretzels and tins of cookies and sandwiches wrapped in t-shirts into large paper grocery sacks and headed off. My most preeminent meeting was with the Queen of Hearts. I did not know what to expect. So I stepped off into the surreal and unreal world and... nothing. Woke up. And I nodded to myself and thought two things:

1) the preparation for the meeting with the Queen of Hearts was the more important part of the dream, which is why I never got to experience the supposed goal of the dream while I slept.

2) that I would be walking into a surreal and unreal world to meet with the Queen of Hearts is just as likely an outcome of going to grad school than any other expectation I've created. I simply do not know what to expect from this. Everyone who's been through something like it tells me it is nothing like anything else I've done. So I may as well expect a meeting with the Queen of Hearts, and at least know that it *probably* won't be that.

All told, it was a satisfying dream. I got to hang out with my sister and wrap a sandwich in a long-sleeve blue t-shirt. You really can't beat that.

xxx

Michael and I are officially registered for classes. My TA training starts on Monday. Classes for both of us start the following Monday. Michael is taking Chinese. I am so incredibly jealous. I'll be taking three classes this semester: Methodologic Foundation of Psychology, Cultural Community Psychology, and Community Psychology Research. The last is the course from which my Masters Thesis will be derived.

I haven't yet met my advisor/mentor person. In person. We've talked on the phone, of course. He was the first person who called me from any of the grad schools I applied to. I'll be meeting him in person for the first time this coming Tuesday. Queen of Hearts. Everything and nothing to expect because it doesn't matter. It will be different anyway.

In all of this, I am actually not nervous. I'm excited. But I don't have anxiety. I don't worry that I'll mess up or get or wrong or anything like that. I do have the confidence of my past, of knowing there has not yet been anything I wanted to do that I have not bee able to do. At least for reasons stemming from myself. As it is, I can hardly wait.